Embracing Self-Compassion

My 2025 Journey to Becoming

Dec 29, 2024

Every year, I choose a theme to guide me through the next 365 days. It’s not a resolution—it’s so much more than that. A theme is a principle, a guidepost for the attitudes and qualities I want to nurture in my life. It’s less about checking off boxes and more about planting seeds that will grow long after the year has passed. Each theme becomes a part of me, shaping how I show up in the world and how I step closer to my future self.

In the past, my themes have been lifelines, pulling me through life’s storms:

2022: Peace and Joy – This was the year I got serious about cutting ties with environments and habits that perpetuated old wounds and reintroduced trauma into my life.
2023: Be Courageous – I took a leap of faith and left a toxic work environment, moved out of my family home to start fresh, gained financial independence, shifted my career focus toward mental wellness and resilience, and began building the Shire Bonsai Network, which has become a cornerstone of my journey.
2024: Be Curious – I moved out of state, opened myself to the possibilities of dating, and released the judgment I once held toward people whose choices seemed self-sabotaging. I also challenged my own mental boundaries, diving into books I’d previously dismissed because fear and rigid paradigms held me back. Curiosity didn’t just expand my horizons—it rescued me from a life of stagnation and fear.

These themes aren’t just pretty words I jot down in a journal and forget. They become living questions that echo in my quiet moments: Is this interaction contributing to peace and joy in my life? Are these thoughts aligned with peace and joy? Is my behavior fostering peace and joy in this space?

Each theme grounds me in life’s messy, beautiful chaos, bringing clarity when the way forward feels uncertain. With every passing year, these themes seem to deepen, offering me new ways to practice self-awareness and growth. They’ve added so much color to my Life Adventure—and, truthfully, I love who I am a little more with each step forward.

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This Year’s Personal Theme: Self-Compassion

As I step into 2025, my theme is self-compassion. This year, I’m rewriting the story I tell myself about who I am. I want to see myself the way God sees me—the way my loved ones see me—flawed, yes, but also endlessly worthy of love.

My first goal is to reframe my negative self-talk. You know that voice in your head? The one that whispers sharp criticisms and never seems to let up? Mine’s been running wild for years, telling me things like, You’re not a good person. You have to struggle to be successful. Certain people always deserve access to you, no matter the cost.

This year, I’m calling that voice out for what it is: a liar. Instead of letting old wounds dictate my present, I’m choosing to talk to myself the way I’d talk to someone I love. With kindness. With empathy. Self-compassion is the foundation I’ll build on as I navigate boundaries, relationships, and the uncharted waters of becoming.

My next goal is to release the heavy shackles of guilt and shame. I’m learning to take responsibility only for the things I can control, and even when I stumble, to understand that my worthiness does not waver. Mistakes do not define me; they are simply opportunities to grow. By letting go of these burdens, I can embrace a life filled with grace, forgiveness, and self-love—a life that reflects the person I am becoming.

How I Picked My Theme

Self-compassion didn’t just appear as my theme for 2025—it emerged after years of seeking what I truly needed. For much of my life, I’ve struggled with negative self-talk and a deeply ingrained “savior” complex. There’s a part of me that prioritizes the needs and feelings of others, often at the expense of my own well-being. This tendency has trapped me in cycles of guilt, constantly bending to be more “palatable” to those I love, even when it costs me my mental health.

Over the years, I’ve started setting boundaries, but they’ve felt fragile. Too often, they crumble when someone presents an “urgent matter” that needs my attention. My heart bends, my resolve weakens, and once again, I put myself last.

Choosing self-compassion is my way of saying, Enough! It’s my commitment to choosing myself—my well-being, my peace, my joy. It’s about holding my boundaries with love and respect, not just for others, but for myself. Self-compassion is my promise to stop betraying my needs for the sake of guilt or obligation and to start living in a way that honors my worth.

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Why Is Self-Compassion Important?

Self-compassion is a cornerstone of emotional well-being. It’s the art of treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you’d offer to someone you love. It’s about embracing your imperfections and recognizing that being human means being flawed—and that’s more than okay; it’s what makes us beautifully real.

Dr. Kristin Neff, a leading researcher in self-compassion, highlights three essential components:

Self-Kindness: Speaking to yourself with warmth and care, especially during moments of failure or struggle.
Common Humanity: Recognizing that imperfection and hardship are universal experiences. You are never alone in your challenges.
Mindfulness: Observing your thoughts and feelings without judgment, allowing them to exist without letting them overwhelm you.

Practicing self-compassion is transformative. It dismantles the cycle of shame and self-doubt, creating space for resilience and growth. When we meet ourselves with love and understanding, we unlock a strength that helps us navigate life’s challenges with grace. Self-compassion empowers us to stand back up when we fall, to forgive ourselves, and to continue moving forward, stronger and more whole than before.

An Invitation to Join the Adventure

Thank you for walking alongside me on this journey. Your support, your encouragement, and simply your presence mean more than words can express. As I lean into self-compassion in 2025, my hope is that it sparks something in you too—a desire to nurture the quality or attitude that feels most meaningful for your next chapter.

So, I challenge you: pick a theme for 2025. Make it personal, something that resonates deeply within you. Let it become your compass, guiding your choices, shaping your growth, and anchoring you when the way forward feels uncertain. Themes have a quiet but profound power to influence not just what we do, but who we are becoming.

I’d love to hear from you! Share your 2025 theme or resolution in the comments.